Caregiver’s New Year’s Resolutions

Caregivers

• 1. Delegate. Prepare a list of caregiving activities you could use help with. When someone offers to help, refer to the list. Better yet, determine who might help you with each task and then ask for the help. See the list at right for more ideas.
• 2. Create a Family CareGroup. Organize all those that help you into a community circle using our free service that lets everyone pitch in with meals, rides, and other caregiving tasks.
• 3. Get enough rest. Find ways to ensure that you get 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night. What daily activities can you cut out or delegate to make more time for rest? Can you hire someone or get help from friends?
• 4. Make and keep preventive care appointments. You can’t take good care of your loved one if you aren’t feeling well yourself. Be sure to keep important doctor’s appointments like mammograms and prostate screenings.
• 5. Be kind to yourself. Shake off any self-criticism or guilt that you aren’t doing all you could be doing. Remind yourself daily that you’re doing the best you can for your loved one and your family.
• 6. Take 5, 10, 15, or more. Commit to doing at least one thing you enjoy or need every day. This might mean meditating, reading a spiritual passage, walking, listening to music, or sewing — whatever restores your spirit.
• 7. Learn about local resources. Most caregivers don’t take full advantage of the support available nearby. Start by contacting your local Area Agency on Aging, Medicare or Medicaid office, 211.org, a local chapter of a national disease-specific organization, or the nearest senior center.
• 8. Get papers organized. Make sure your loved one’s important papers are in order now. Discuss how he’d like to receive medical treatment and then document his wishes using an advance care directive. Work with your loved one to establish a healthcare proxy, providing copies to all healthcare providers.
• 9. Plan for your own long term care. Establish at least a rough idea of how you’ll pay for your own long term care. Consider all your options, including reverse mortgages, long term care insurance, and personal savings.
• 10. Give thanks. If a friend or family member spent time with your loved one during the holidays or helped you with any of your responsibilities, be sure to send a quick note expressing your thanks. It’ll encourage more help in the year ahead.

Friends and Family

• 1. Go beyond one-time help. Find repeatable ways to help the caregiver in your life. Ideas include mowing the lawn, grocery shopping, providing rides to appointments, and preparing or delivering a meal.
• 2. Help with family meetings. Family meetings are a good way to keep everyone engaged and working together. Ask the caregiver if you can help by scheduling a time, preparing an agenda, or even setting up a conference call number.
• 3. Provide emotional support. Set up a weekly time to call or visit your caregiving friend or family member. Try to provide a comfortable way for him or her to vent frustrations or to simply stay connected.
• 4. Establish a weekly practice. If possible, find one activity you can do every week for the caregiver. Ideas: take the care recipient to church, watch him or her for a couple of hours at the same time every week, or pick up medications.
• 5. Cold, hard cash. Can’t be there in person to help your sister? Don’t underestimate the power of money to cover caregiving costs, including respite care that will let her take the breaks she needs.
• 6. Get your own house in order. Give some thought to how you’ll pay for your own long term care. Research all the options and put your plan in place.
• 7. Bon voyage! Help finance or arrange a vacation, including the necessary substitute care. Even helping your family member or friend get away for a night or two can make a big difference.
• 8. Research community help. Chances are your friend or family member doesn’t have time to research all the help available in the community. Find out what’s available in terms of respite care, adult day care, transportation, home improvements, and so on.
• 9. Help with home safety. Provide peace of mind by helping to make the care recipient’s home safer. If you’re handy (or know someone who is), offer to do an inspection of the home and make any changes needed, such as installing grab bars in the bathroom or adding more lights.
• 10. Be an exercise buddy. Regular exercise does wonders for caregivers’ stress levels. Commit to regular walks, trips to the gym, or gardening with your family member or friend. Both of you will be glad you did.

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